I Was Caught Off Guard — But I Wasn't Unprepared

"When I am afraid, I put my trust in you... In God, whose word I praise—in God I trust and am not afraid." — Psalm 56:3-4

For My Unbound Friend,

This past week I didn't know what I would be facing. But because of who I am, I was prepared. I'm not gonna lie — it was rough. Not from the aftermath of grief, just things that had been going on underneath that I wasn't fully aware of.

Some months ago, something happened, and my intuition let me know what I needed to do — and to prepare. So because I trusted myself, and had already put in the necessary effort, I was ready even though I was caught off guard. I felt numb, because I had already been doing the things I needed to do. Much of what I was facing didn't require me to fight harder. It required me to stay present. Sometimes it's hard to separate your feelings from the work in front of you — to other people it can look like you don't care. But for me, I was just focused on doing what needed to be done.

Here's what I learned: when you're taking care of others, if you're not careful, you can neglect yourself. I'm learning to keep leading with integrity in everything I do — because leading with integrity and transparency is what lets you stand even when it gets rough.

I also learned it's okay to have emotions. They're what make us who we are. If you caught this week's Freedom Friday, you already know I've been sitting with that lesson — giving myself permission to feel instead of staying numb just to keep moving.

I spent a lot of time resting on my faith this week, and working on the Unbound Journal I'm creating. There's a verse I kept coming back to — when I am afraid, I put my trust in you — because that's really what the week came down to. Not the absence of fear, but where I put my trust in the middle of it. I walked through my own REVERSE Fear steps, page by page, and the eucatastrophe — the unexpected good — is this: I get to keep showing up, because the work isn't done.

Here's some of what I found when I looked back at that week, one page at a time:

That's it. Not "closed the deal." Not "hit the milestone." Showing up. Some weeks, that's the whole win.

If you're in a season where showing up is the most honest thing you can offer — I see you. It counts.

What would it look like for you to release one thing before you enter next week?

Watch this week's Freedom Friday: "I Stopped Feeling So I Could Keep Going"
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